Bobakey[dot]net

I'm kind of annoyed by a comment that I recieved on my last entry. Comments are always muchly appreaciated but its not nice when someone turns around and states that:

"You should be happy anyway. For one, that your boyfriend is feeling better now. And that you even got to see him in the first place. Sounds to me, like you take him for granted--and you do."

Perhaps I should just brush this comment off, and forget about it. But its just got to me. I can't portray in any shape or form the FULL extent of the relationship that I have with my boyfriend. I can't get it across to people because its so special to Tom and myself. I'm sure that other people feel the same way when trying to describe their relationship.


I will put my hands up and admit the fact that perhaps my last entry was a bit harse towards Tom, considering that he was ill etc, but we spoke about the way that Tom treated me on that day. He said that it was unfair, and he was sorry.


I can't express how much it hurts me when I get told that I should be happy that I even got to see him... both myself and Tom really struggle at times to see each other, it is very true. But that doesn't mean that we both don't realise how happy we are to see each other. Thats what makes it so special is that when we are together it makes up for all the time that we are apart.


How can someone know through my blog if I take my boyfriend for granted, and for the record I don't. I adore Tom, perhaps more than he will ever realise. I don't at all take him for granted, we are together because we love each other and love being with each other. We are in a relationship and sometimes as all relationships do go.. that you have fights or disagreements and perhaps this one was one. But I didn't take him for granted.


I'm deeply happy that Tom is feeling better, and for anyone's information, Tom suffers with a number of different illnesses, but I've never fully written about these because that doesn't mean anything to me because Tom is still who he is. Illness or no Illness, he is still Tom. I have been with him on several times when Tom has been quite ill, and had to go to hospital because of it. So I know what its like when he is ill.. I live with it.


If anyone else wishes to discuss the relationship that I have with my boyfriend then feel free to leave a comment asking to discuss about it and both Tom and myself will be happy to talk to you about how much we really do take each other for 'granted' *grrrr*


Petty, very petty.


Thank you for the comments people, and just to let you know Tom is full and fighting fit and I'm still struggling with the cold, but no worries :D


Have fun, and sorry for the rant, just had to get it off my chest.
luvs

xXx

It's been nearly 2 weeks, but shhh no one noticed anyways!


So I've been all over the show of late. I stayed a week at Tom's and to be honest I had a good time but there was a moment of dispare. On my last day staying with <3 the boyfriend, Tom, he managed to get a cold. He took the day off work, which of course was brilliant because we would have the whole day together before I go away into the distance for ages..


You would have thought it would have been good. Hmm... not exactly. He moaned, he slept, and this was pretty much all he did for the 12 hours he was alive for. I spent all day in his room, which isn't that big, but even so... I just wanted to do something, get out, do SOMETHING - anything. But I stayed with him. It was hell. He was really off, seriously off with me. He moaned lots, I had to run around all day for him, and then when he wasn't any of the above... he slept. Like a log.


Not really what I call a fun day :(


But hey sometimes in life you have to do things that you don't really want to do, and this was the thing that I did not want to do but I did. So I stuck it out with him and by the end of the day he was starting to feel better. We had to cancel going to the opening of a new art show and also seeing his best friend *sighs* The things you do for love.


Oh and in case anyone wanted to know its nearly 5 months now.. [one more month and its half a year... WOW]


So that didn't exactly make me too happy.. but hey I survived... up until today/kinda yesterday evening. I now have the cold. Oh yes... headache, pains, snotty-ness, and all the rest. Yes pass me the tissues for I feel that I'm going to dribble green everywhere. It's not pretty :( Infact I want to curl up in a ball and let this cold get bored and disappear, which of course it won't...


I'm ILL


On a different note, half term is now over so I go back to college tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it.. perhaps this way my cold will get lost amoungst the crowd of other people and never find me again... shame hehe :D


I'm worried, quite a fair amount about Wednesday night, which happens to be when I'm performing with the rest of my group our Ghost performance. It's bad.. seriously bad. Thinking about it, its almost primary school style. BUT the main thing is that we go NO marks on it, and if it goes wrong its just something to write about on our coursework which DOES get marked :D


The factor that we have 3 days and we haven't finished yet does nothing for me... oh and we have no costumes of props and I'm ill... so... lets just see what tomorrow brings.


Lets hope to whoever I'm praying to today that its all going to run smoothly.. hehe


much luv, snotty-ness and all

xXx

*yawns* I'm too tired to blog right now, but if I don't my fingers will curl up at the ends due to lack of writing/diary making. I just had a 10 minute power nap - if that is even possible. But somehow I managed it and feel somewhat refreashed because of it.


I've been busy with this and busy with that, I hardly have any time for myself. *chuckles* I remember the days when I had nothing better to do but sit at a computer playing games... now I'm running charity events, setting up societies, rehearsing and all sorts. *sighs* Being a student is meant to be lazy... What Happened?!


Mondays are horrible. Haha need I say more?


On Mondays I leave the house at 7:15AM and arrive home at 7:00PM. 11 hours and 45 minutes of pure out of house-ness. It's not nice, frankly its not very nice AT ALL. I get the train home and I'm practically falling asleep. [This would be the point where I miss my train stop and end up in London... luckily it hasn't happened .. YET]


Tom came up for the weekend and we spent it all snuggly together. I was starting to miss him. Seriously miss him. I missed him to the point where I wasn't sure what was going to happen and in the end we had a massive argument over the phone. Started: 11:00PM Finished: 02:00AM... is it any wonder why I've been so tired of late? But we sorted it all out and he came up and it twas good.


We went out for dinner with Craig and Jason [who are engaged] and just had a generally BRILLIANT night. Although Craig got quite drunk and kept on saying sorry and felt rather embarressed. I think its more because Tom is T Total, only because Alcohol doesn't do well with him. So its good :) Might even explain why he drinks so much coke hehe.


We went to a wine bar, and then onto a Italian resturant - where the food was soooo big and sooo lush *drools* and then onto a quiet pub/resturant/hotel. The best part was where I was sitting I could see the mens toilets, and there happened to be this step down into it. Now because people were looking for the toilets the failed to notice where the step was. And OOPS... down the went. Around 6 people fell down it during the course of the night and I was wetting myself with laughter over it *sighs* Perhaps one of those had to be there moments :D


So yes the weekend with Tom was super dooper, all loved up and what have you. Although I don't really get a chance to miss him as I'm going down for a week during half term [starting this friday] YAY. Living with the boyfriend *woo woo*


Backtracking a bit and on a different note, I went to look around Rose Bruford Drama School [or Theatre School as they put it] and it was amazing. I loved every bit of it... just WOW. Totally mind blowing. The only down side is that 2000 people audition for the Acting course that I'm going for and only 26-28 people get in... Tough aye? But I could really see myself there... wow.. the thought of it scares me. ALOT.


Thanks to dad for taking me :) [not that he reads this]
Much love to the boyfriend Thomas :D


And... I miss you kate..


luvs

xXx

I'm starting to get really worried about Tom. He has had this viral bug [or at least that is what the doctors have been saying] and he wasn't allowed to eat for 48 hours - which he did last weekend. But even now he isn't quite right. He seems to have a slightly ok day and then suddenly feel rotten the next and starts to throw up again. :( I'm worried.


He should be having some tests done this week so hopefully they can determine what he has got. The only thing is that he already suffers with ALOT of allergy's [Red Meat, Dairy Products, Citus Fruits - the list goes on...] and he already suffers from IBS and I'm just really worried that he is going to have something else, and it will only cause more pain.


*sighs* There is nothing I can do though, not with being so far away from him, so its all love and telephone hugs from here in on. :) But not to worry, he is coming up on Friday and spending the weekend *ayyayayay* :D:D Aww... happy times hehe


So would you believe it that October is already upon us? The years get faster every year, how time flies when you are getting old. :D Haha I'm 17 and already I class myself as old. I'm 17 going in 40...


Kay [the sister] came back from Uni this weekend for the first time this year. Aw was good to find her straightening her hair at the top of the stairs as I crept up them in my sleepy early morning state. It's been so quiet without her, not just any sort of quiet but to the degree where you purposely make noise just to fill the empty silence


Saturday we had all family down, well at least half of them. My aunt is flying back from some hot country as we speak, and my Uncle is celebrating my cousins first birthday ... [and I have yet to even see her] - It was Kay's birthday [20] on Wednesday but of course we couldn't celebrate it so this was the right chance, oh and it was also my other cousins birthday so we all came together.


It was plesant I suppose, good to see everyone, but as always I feel so awkward around my own extended family. Not sure why. I just do. *shrugs* It's almost like I can't fully be who I want to be but thats me just being a little bit silly.


Ok I'm a geek. It's a FACT. I downloaded this programme so that I could play game boy games on my computer. Of course I had to go ahead and download the best game boy game I've ever had... POKEMON! :) Call my sad, call me a geek, but I loved them... "Gota Catch Them All!"


Perhaps in a slightly less geeky way but more of an obsessed way.. I reinstalled The Sims 2 yesterday and went about designing mine and Tom's dream home. 2 Bedroom's [one being VERY big] 2 Bathrooms, A MASSIVE living room, with an open plan kitchen, a seating area and garden area. Hehe. We are madly in love. As you know... these things happen.


Hmm.. Perhaps you know that you are madly in love with someone when you make yourself and your other half on sims and make your dream home :D - What do you think?


Luvs to all,

xXx

I had been Dreading the weekend just gone. I was scared, very scared. Everyone said that I would be fine, they would love me, everyone already loves you, how could they not?! Of course I didn't believe a word that anyone said. As far as I was concern I was the little boy that was dating the bigger boy who's parents would hate me. End of Story.


So MP weekend arrived [MP = Meeting Parents], I got the train and travelled into London, then got the train out of London for an another hour where I arrived at Swindon. I had no idea what to expect. But I took it on my shoulders and the knots in my stomach were hurting BUT I still got off the train and smiled.


I was met by Tom who said that his mum was in the car *I'm worried*, the big yellow car *I'm worried* I quickly asked Tom what her name was... Right. Lynne. *I'm worried* I got into the car and sat in the front seat next to his Mum. *AHhhhhhhhhhhhh* So here I was sitting in the car next to my boyfriends mum.


It was alright, actually it turned out to be more than ok. I did my best, smiled, and was polite, hell I was so polite that I could have been serving the queen.


Lynne is a retired nurse, she still holds those qualities of nurse in her. She seems loving and is softly spoke but then at the same time, if you step out of line she is sure to put you in place with a semi authoritive voice. Lynne is Iris and has a slight accent, but I loved it. She was amazingly nice to me, and I'm so grateful for that.


Once we arrived at Tom's parents house, the house that Tom had lived in for 10 years... we met Tom's step dad Chris. Let me talk about the house first. It use to be a post office, set in the countryside in a small village. It's all quite low ceilings with exposed beams throughout. It had that real country cottage feel to it. Or rather it felt like a family home. With 3 Bedrooms, 4 Bathrooms, a Kitchen, Living Room, Sitting Room, An Office, A study, a conseratry, - its IMPRESSIVE!


The best feature of the house has to be the garden. It's massive. MASSIVE and some more. It is on a hill which a stream that runs along the bottom, very nice! It has 2 ponds, a well, around 15 different types of fruit grows in the garden. Not to forget their own vegatable patch and different herbs.


So Chris: This is Tom's Step dad, after his real dad left when he was around 3. Chris is kind of big boned. He has a hearty laugh on him. This has to be a key feature of him. He laughs like a polition, full of lungs and full of heart. What a laugh! He enjoys gardening and is very intelligent after studying in Cambridge!


I will be honest and say that in all fair-ness we didn't do alot at all over the weekend, but it was so eventful. Tom hadn't been feeling very well since Thursday, and he couldn't eat anything without throwing it back up. It wasn't pleasant. His mother being a nurse decided that action was needed. So action was performed. All in the car and off to hospital!


So much for meeting the parents. It was a shock put it that way. There were many comments about how unfair it was that all this had to happenw hen I was down. Especially seen as it was meant to be all about meeting and greeting. But I didn't mind. It almost felt good. So after being at the hospital for a while Tom found out that he had a viral stomach bug. No eating for 48 hours.. eeek! :'(


Saturday passed by pretty quickly, but in odd fashion. We doodled around the house, not really doing anything. I had my first experience using a Sauna. Yes they have a Sauna... how COOOL HOT! Tom couldn't join me because he wasn't feeling at all well. So I did it all by myself.. but because there is a bench in the 'wet bathroom' [Title on the floor, and the shower just hanging off the wall so you shower and then mob the floor afterwards towards a drain.. VERY WIERD] he just sat and watched me do all this, and kept me company. It was weird showering in front of someone, especially when Tom wasn't joining in.


We had dinner around 10pm with Tom's Parents in the PJ's ... another weird experience :D But at the same time it just felt like that I had been accepted into the family.. one way or another.


Me and Tom weren't allowed to share a room :'( so I had a whole double bed and an en suite all to myself, hehe. I didn't know what to do with myself :) Just before we went to bed Tom's sister Heather [whp shares the same bday as my sister] turned up and quickly went to bed without us talking much.


Heather: she is lovely, so down to earth and very much like her mum. Easy to talk to and get along with. She is without any doubts the oldest of the 3 brother/sister relationship and she shows this by being the mother. But I liked this quality about her. Overal, a top girl!


The next morning we all had a family breakfast before Heather went off to go and get Jamie, Tom's twin. They are indentical, but if they were.. boy would that have been interesting :D


We again did not do alot during the course of the day, which for me allowed me to full relax. Tom was feeling ALOT better so that was good... we got to be more like a couple and kind of snuggle up to each other on the sofa.


I met Tom's brother Jamie.. now Jamie is lovely. He is VERY easy to talk to, and we talked for ages about various things. VERY down to earth and just a generally nice guy. If perhaps a player with the ladies, lol. He is the opposite to Tom but at the same time you could tell that he was like the bigger brother, despite the fact that Tom was the oldest out of them hehe. I liked Jamie :D


We had a family meal which was nice. We had this Raclette which is a kind of grill that you sit in the middle of the table, and you cook your meat on top. Then you had these little cup holder things that you put under the grill and you melt cheese in them. It was soooo NICE. and its also a real social meal. As everyone is moving and eating and cooking each other's food. Twas brilliant.


So it wasn't as far as I thought it was going to be and HELL, I may have even enjoyed myself! I'm not afraid of them anymore, oh and I gave them a bottle of wine and they were so happpy lol. Alcohol solves most awkwardness!


This is kind of off topic but in the last 2 days both my cousins have found out that I'm gay. I was shocked. lol. I thought they would take it badly, but infact they have taken it really well *hugs to them* Sometimes its just nice to know that your family always cares about you, no matter how often you see them or how far away they are.


Right I'm tired and need sleep, have to be up in 6 hours - EEEEK. Must remember to write in the next entry about stopping a man from shop lifting and erm... erm the fact that I love my boyfriend -do I not do that enough already?!-


luvs

xXx